![]() ![]() Even worse, older children may come to doubt their own perceptions and judgments long term.ģ novels of resilience and hope: 'Vera,' 'Chanel Sisters,' 'Orphan Collector' When they are eventually told the truth either by parents or someone outside the family, trust is often irreparably damaged. While understandable, long-held secrets within a family create a false sense of reality for children. Parents will sometimes jointly choose to keep a secret from children, withholding information that is too overwhelming or age-inappropriate. The most damaging outcome is when one or more of the children come to believe that they are responsible for whatever rift is going on in the home. Yet, children are often extremely perceptive, and can become alarmed because they sense a disruption in the parental bond. The rest of the family may sense that something feels off without being able to pinpoint why. ![]() The problem here is that it inevitably results in one partner pulling away and putting up walls. One spouse keeping a secret from the other is the most common occurrence. ![]()
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